Friday, August 14, 2009

iRAGE



I have no better picture.


I shall list the stuff that killed off many American comics for me:

1. Iron Man - it was damn good, and then, Nick Fury beat down Tony Stark, and Tony Stark became a lackey to SHIELD.

2. Spiderman - Peter is a clone of Ben, Venom becomes a father to Toxin (another symbiote), Doc Ock is Peter's adoptive father.

3. X-men - Wolverine vs THE FUCKING UNIVERSE, and won.

4. Silver Surfer - Doctor Doom beat him, and he became 'The Watcher' and he lived on a planet with giant walking caterpillars that have sex with him to cast future visions of the universal flow of time.

5. Batman - he joined the League, nuff said. and before that back in Detective Comics, he had a pink Bat suit.

6. Superman - Superman's family came and join him on earth, all hell broke loose. Several years later, there is Superboy, Supergirl, Superauntie, Supergrandpa, Superkid, Superwhatever... and Superman can apparently shoot lasers to destroy planets lol.

7. Hulk - World War Hulk has the ability to tear up continents, fuck that.

8. The Flash - He can run 10 times the speed of light. BECAUSE FUCK YOU EINSTEIN.

9. Elektra - Shit just got real and movie that sucks.

10. X-men (specific universe or some other) - Revealed: Sinister can control universes, Thanos attacked and just won't stay dead after getting killed THEN HE IS NOT REALLY KILLED NOW ISN'T HE? Scott had a son. Rogue became Peter Petrelli and Mystique is her mom. Cable came from the future to fuck shit up in the present, and then Apocalypse shows up and all of a sudden, Galactus too. It was all over with yet again, the ULTIMATE NULIFIER, a device as simple as a bloody teapot (and looks like one except palm sized) that SCARES THE FUCK OUT OF GALACTUS from eating earth.

1 comment:

Please write with care, don't want to offend anyone where possible, take it easy! posting is encouraged.